I'll Stay Me

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This past Friday, I finally moved back into Huntsville. I came down Thursday night because my move-in time was from 8-10 and I was not waking up that early. But Friday was the first real day back.

I will totally admit. 

I was dreading that day for weeks. Months too. You see, when I left Huntsville back in May, I was in a real bad place emotionally and mentally. At the end of April, they put me on a non-official suicide watch for a few hours. I left Huntsville with a lot of hate and anger and hurt.

This summer was all about recovery and rebuilding. Becoming comfortable in my own skin. I'm not totally there yet, but I'm working on it. So far, Huntsville has been a lot better than I thought. 

I've realized, I'm not just one person. I'm one person to a lot of different people. If I'm with my girlfriends, I can be loud and sassy, around people I don't know, I can be shy and quiet. Or anything in between. 

I'm a lot of different people to a lot of different people.

But to the core, I'm still one girl. And while it's taken me a loooooong time to come to this point, I'm at a point where I'm okay with myself. Okay with the fact that I am who I am.

And I think I'll just stay me. 


Laura Elizabeth said...

that is such an important realization to come to laura, and while i don't know you very well, i know everything will work out. praying for you girl.

Laura Elizabeth said...

I really liked when you said, "I've realized, I'm not just one person. I'm one person to a lot of different people." I once had someone tell me how I'm different when I'm with my husband or with friends. I wanted to say, "why wouldn't I be?" I'm still the same person but different people bring other side out of you, sides that were already there but get fed a bit by each person.

Also I love that photo of you and your honesty in this post. Cheers to positive progress!

Laura Elizabeth said...

I've noticed this too. With my friends, I'm always very loud and funny and I love to make jokes. But I've got a few friends, for whatever reason, I literally can not be that person around them. Embarrassment maybe? I don't know!

Laura Elizabeth said...

Thank you! It was a big wake up call when I realized it.

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